Placain: she broke up with

getzburg: I took a girl out tonight for her birthday. She ditched me to hit on other men. Die.

Placain: Somehow, I knew that “die” would be an integral part of whatever response you had.

getzburg: Yeah, well. Guess I’m just predictable like that. Oh, and she just stopped by to let me know that she hooked up with some guy! I FEEL GREAT! STICK A SHARP OBJECT IN MY INNARDS! FUCKING CHRIST